Enie Menie Minie Mo!!

So, it’s a typical spring weekend: cocktails and pastry all Friday night while chit-chatting on Facebook; sleeping in late Saturday morning to be awoken by the mid-day sun; a lazy lunch date followed by light shopping scouting out the sales; talking with my Mom on SKYPE….. blah blah blah. But this weekend, the issue of ‘choice’ came up: the argument of passing up on one thing in order to do something else: the discourse of looking at ones limited resources, analyzing the options and making an informed decision to do ‘A’ instead of ‘B’. I was forced to discuss OPPORTUNITY COSTS!

Some people hate making choices, while some find it an easy task to do. I’m not sure where I stand on this spectrum, but all I know is that some choices are second to nature and are self made. Some choices do not require the convening of a grand jury and the presentation of facts from both parties and a vote to determine the ‘way forward’. Some choices should be almost predictable. SHOULD!!

Now, opportunity costs may seem like one of those technical economical terms you only hear on the business segment of the news or if you stayed awake during your ‘Econ’ lectures in college! But it’s so basic to nature. As fabulous human being we are, we encounter ‘opportunity costs’ on a daily basis. We have choices. We choose to do one thing instead of something else. We choose to buy a Ralph Lauren spring scarf instead of paying off that visa credit card. We choose to have another slice of pizza instead of a salad. We choose coffee instead of tea and fish instead of steak. We choose to date a tall, handsome European Investment Banker instead of a short, ok-looking Japanese school teacher. We choose to stay in an unhappy relationship instead of fighting the fear and leaving that bastard. We choose to surround ourselves with specific friends instead of others. We choose to invest in some friendships and relationships instead of others.

But one thing is sure is that with ‘opportunity costs’ comes the ‘’option’’ that wasn’t chosen; the visa card that wasn’t paid; the salad that wasn’t eaten; the steak that wasn’t ordered; the tea that wasn’t drunk; the short Japanese guy; the happy life you could have lived if you had just been a little more brave and left him; and the friends and lovers you mistreated and constantly hurt.

I’m not naive! I know that life is filled with alternatives/options and we have to choose one over another and forgo the benefits of not having the one we didn’t choose. But the beauty with life is that it gives us some simple choices that when we analyze the benefits we can receive from acquiring either ‘option’, there is a clear winning. So then, why is it that some people constantly choose the ‘’wrong’’ option? – hate over love; sadness over happiness; temporary vices or permanent friendships; one night of lust over a long life of companionship. I’ll never know!

OK!!!! So, I know that choices are an individual thing and no one should ‘judge’ someone else for making his/her choices. But, when it comes to friendships and relationships that you are a part of, clearly you are allowed to ‘appeal’ the ruling of the ‘court’ and the decision/choice that has been made. But then, do you really want to know why you were passed up for something ‘better’? [I would!] Who likes to be the runner-up? Who likes to know that you have been consistently investing in a friendship and when a simple choice was given, you were left un-chosen? And I guess the most hurtful part is that if you were passed up for the simple things, what will happen when the big issues come?

Choices! Values! Choices aren’t made in isolation. Each option in a ‘decision tree’ has a value attached to it. ‘Value’….a tricky word. It’s like ‘love’. How do you measure it? How do you show it? Well, lucky for us, like love, our human reactions say everything about how we feel/value things. Open my closet….Feel free to go and nose around. You can borrow any sweater you want from my closet, EXCEPT my Liz Claiborne and DKNY ones. And that’s because I put a highER value on those. So, don’t be fooled! When our friends make choices regarding us, either way, a big PRICE TAG has been stamped on our faces. What does yours say? – DISCOUNTED or CUSTOM MADE?

So, however the dice rolls and whatever ‘price tag’ you got stamped on your forehead, just make the best of it, because it’s life. On the flip side (there we go again….choices) ‘KARMA’ is a big BITCH! Watch out!


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Angelique
    Jul 05, 2011 @ 14:58:31

    Choices, I made one jus now to comment on this articles, and will continue to do so because of the value I place on ma friendship with the author. I agree with u that we surely play the economic decision-maker everyday, but are we truly evaluating our choices to clearly see the one that has major benefit to us, or is our decisions based on our emotional engagement at the time, our psyche, our social influence. Because paying off ma credit card debt and wearing a dress I recently wore to a high celeb attended party might make me a social outcast, where as buying that totally fab dress/suit will make me quite the talk of the night, get me a few more intense dates, an impromtu relationship and then in the quiet of the night or behind closed office doors I negoitiate with the collectors to pay ma debt. I see no clear winnings here, unless we all have a different view as to what we decide to be ‘winnings’ and even then that is a choice. Choice is such a hard thing to make these days, and like myself that need help in making even personal choices, call it the jury effect, i might be told as I was told only a couple days ago that I have a dependent personality disorder, a symptom of which is failure to make choices on ma own….so I might just be in a economic cost distress anytime soon.


  2. fromtops2bottoms
    Jul 05, 2011 @ 15:18:56

    Yes Sarah!! DECISIONS! DECISIONS!! Some decisions are second to nature.. shouldnt warrant a jury to be convened and a judgment mad! No sah!

    I hope you develop the skills to be decisive! It’s important! 🙂


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